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Category: Daily Life

Outlander first impressions

Outlander first impressions

Unfortunately there can be way more than one   Once, in grammar school, I passed some junior girls in the corner of a stairwell hunched over a Trapper Keeper. They were assiduously writing, they confided in hushed tones, a Harlequin romance. At the time I didn’t think it would go anywhere, but perhaps it did and Outlander is it. I cannot believe the number of people on the internets fanatically in love with this book/show and they will not suffer…

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Chaos Theory

Chaos Theory

    They want Coke. “How much Coke are you allowed to have? I say as I open the refrigerator door. Would your mom mind if I gave you some?” “I think we’re ok,” the boy of 8 says. “With ice cream!” said the younger girl, who has just finished first grade. “In the morning?” asked the boy, piqued. JR listens anxiously. I never give him soda. You can see the wheels turning as he computes that if they get…

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Pink Eye / Stink Eye

Pink Eye / Stink Eye

    It’s likely that after an exhausting, protracted battle one could teach one’s child how to be careful in the bathroom to one’s satisfaction. But one can’t get past the nightmare of the child leaning over too far and cracking his head on the porcelain tub, or the tile floor, or the sharp cabinet corner, or some horrific combination of all these things in one stunning accident. So the child wiping his own butt is, at this point, on…

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More Fucking Scorpions

More Fucking Scorpions

    They had sent numerous scouts in recent days and none had returned alive, maybe this time when their golden boy didn’t come back they might finally get the message. We must have had 5 kills in half as many days. You have to be careful with these bastards, they terrify for sport. Their weapon of choice: the night raid. I never go to the kitchen or bathroom without proper eyewear and absolutely never in the dark. Well. Honor…

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Patience

Patience

Last year I went to California for an event. Because of the event I stayed overnight in a nice hotel that had an elegant but cozy, Ritz Carlton – Cottage on the lake kind of feel. In the morning I woke up at a leisurely hour regretting not booking a longer stay but it was too late.  I had just enough time to shower and eat before catching my flight home. I bathed, ate, and got dressed all the time…

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All Men are Fickle When it Comes to Their Stomachs

All Men are Fickle When it Comes to Their Stomachs

  JR was in a great mood, having spent the day in total freedom and then getting to stay up past his bedtime. That’s why instead of an instant rock-solid rejection, he halfway considered coming with me on some errands. I was so charmed by the display of goodwill I didn’t remind him that it wasn’t really a choice because he was seven.   No records were broken, but we did manage to put on pants, shoes, and jacket and…

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Something Old

Something Old

At the grocery store around Halloween, two elderly people sat in the waiting area when James and I came in. JR, with his usual assumption that anything in his path is a hologram, barreled through the old man’s walker, pushing it into his lap. With all his heart he said, “Hi!” The old man’s toothless mouth made a macabre grin. He cackled. This put an immediate halt to JR’s plan for a game of one-sided twenty questions. The old woman…

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